Antiquated, Nutty Laws of the USA and the UK
They forgot to repeal them -- and some still allow murder.
In the UK there are political parties such
as the Monster Raving Loony Party, the Get Stuffed Party and the Fancy Dress
Party, which pursue such policies as painting all the highways the same colour
as they are on the maps, introducing a 99p coin (which isn't actually as stupid
as it sounds if you think of the psychology of retail pricing), appointing Nick
the Flying Brick as the Minister for Abolishing Gravity because they can't
afford a space program, and super-gluing unruly teenagers' heads together
because if you can't beat them you might as well join them.
But the laws mentioned below are actually real laws, passed by real, elected,
legitimate governments.
Now on this page I'm not sure whether to laugh or become seriously alarmed. From time to time in both the USA and the UK -- and most probably all around the world -- it has become necessary to make various laws to cover various unusual eventualities. However these laws can then get filed away in the statute books and forgotten, long after the barmy circumstances which necessitated their passing, have gone.
While they all seem absolutely potty, a few of them are so potentially dangerous that they might even allow a person to get away with murder. But even these have still not been repealed!
Here's a rundown of these loony -- but still enforceable -- laws:
In the USA
In Florida there's no farting after 6pm, and if you tie an elephant to a parking meter you have to pay the same as for a car. In Minnesota you can't cross the state line with a duck on your head, in Alaska you can't take your flamingo to the barbers, in Pennsylvania you can't catch a fish using any part of your body except your teeth, whaling is illegal in Oklahoma which is interesting because Oklahoma is actually landlocked, in Vermont it's illegal to strip in public but you can walk out the door completely starkers in the first place and set off down the street, in Indiana you're not allowed to take a bath between October and March, in Kansas it's illegal to obtain help from your mule while duck hunting, in New Jersey you can't frown at a cop, you can't take a selfie with a tiger in New York, whistling underwater is illegal in Oregon, and in Maryland you can't take your lion to the movies, while in Nevada you can't ride your camel on the highway.
It's a ticket in North Carolina if you sing out of tune, illegal in Tennessee to catch a fish using a lasso, you can't drive your car in Massachusetts with a gorilla in the back (but it can sit in the front), in Arkansas you can't honk your horn outside a sandwich shop after 9pm, no riding your bicycle above 65 mph in Connecticut, illegal for your donkey to sleep in your bath in Arizona, illegal to keep ice cream in your back pocket in Georgia, you get arrested for wearing a fake moustache in church in Alabama, it's illegal in Idaho to give your sweetheart a box of chocolates weighing more than 50 pounds, one-armed piano players in Idaho are not allowed to charge and you need a permit to buy onions after dark, and in Kentucky you can't dye a duck blue and sell it unless you sell at least six at once.
In the UK
Trespassing is illegal unless you've climbed a tree to point at a fish, looking guilty is illegal if you're holding a salmon, it's illegal to land on a cow if you fall off your cart, all taxis are still technically required to carry a bale of hay and a bucket of water while the driver must ask each passenger if he has smallpox or the plague, it's illegal to drop dead in Parliament because they have to give you a state funeral, it is legal to kill a Scotsman with a bow and arrow in York except on a Sunday, and it's legal to kill a Welshman in Chester as long as its with a crossbow inside the city walls after midnight.
Urinating in public is legal as long as it's on the back wheel of your car with your right hand placed on the car roof, it was death by hanging (up til 1965) for treason if you stuck a stamp on an envelope with the monarch's head upside down, all swans and the heads of beached whales belong to the King, it's illegal to go topless in Liverpool unless you're working as a clerk in a shop that sells tropical fish, and until 1988 it was legal for a pregnant woman to relieve herself in a policeman's helmet.
Personally, after all the miscarriages of justice in the UK, such as the Guildford Four, the Birmingham Six, the McGuire Seven, the Tottenham Three, etc...etc... that last bit, about urinating in a policeman's helmet, should in my opinion not only be still legal but the copper should also, without being allowed to empty the helmet out first, be made to put it back on.
-- Michael Alan Marshall
Two British politicians, Prime Minister Theresa May and
Lord Buckethead.
Buckethead campaigns to legalize the hunting of fox hunters.
He is also seen here awaiting his election result with opponent Margaret
Thatcher.
Declaration at Finchley
constituency 1987 General Election - Margaret Thatcher. - YouTube